Will I tell my daughter about climate change?
Thoughts from a climate concerned mama
People sometimes ask, will I tell my daughter about climate change?
Yes, I will, and as soon as I can.
Why?
Because I want her to grow up empowered by the reality of our current times. I want her to see our climate crisis as an opportunity to think again, not as something to fear and neglect.
I want her to grow up with curiosity, open-mindedness, and excitement and to understand that the world as we know it will continue to change.
And in that change, I want her to practice strength and emotional resilience so that she can remain joyful and committed to whatever comes next.
I want her to know that the world isn't fair so that we can work to make it better. And that although she may not have caused the situation we're in, it doesn't mean she can't participate in creating change.
Most of all, I want her to know what a gift it is to be alive and that life isn't to be taken for granted. I want to show her all the world's beauties and tell her that we must stop to smell the flowers and make sure we live every moment as best we can.
Some days, I will be afraid and I will worry about her future. And I will let her know that it's OK to be afraid and worry too. Because if there's one thing I've learned it's that only through accepting uncertainty and embracing our fears are we able to grow and find light through these seemingly dark times.
Better times are coming. I know it in my heart. But only if we choose now to lead with curiosity and courage going forward. Only then can we keep asking questions so that new answers can be found.
It's going to be one heck of a journey and it'll take strength, humility, and resilience to keep going. But it will also require play, excitement, and joy. And that is the story I want her to grow up with.
Quote by a legend
“Hope is often misunderstood. People tend to think that it is simply passive, wishful thinking: I hope something will happen but I’m not going to do anything about it. This is indeed the opposite of real hope, which requires action and engagement.”
— Jane Goodall
Free Chapter from The Book
Below is a free chapter from The Climate Optimist Handbook, available for paid subscribers only.
Chapter 49 — Understanding Optimism
I’ve received some hate for my optimism. I will never forget when my ex-boyfriend yelled at me to please stop being so damn optimistic. I just stood there, silent and stunned. Of all the things I may have expected from our fight, I didn’t expect that.
What hit me was that, apparently, optimism can annoy people. Others think I’m not being realistic. These folks usually claim to be realists while pointing out my naivete. Well, I’m about to eyeroll them back because, get this, optimism is hella important!
It is saving the world important, and I have proof.
Not only is optimism important if we want to change the world, but it’s also been actually scientifically proven that optimism plays a vital role in our health, wealth, and happiness.
I think we can agree that elephants don’t fly, so it could appear realistic to say we won’t see one outside our window tomorrow. But remember this—humans didn’t use to fly either, and anyone who claimed humans would fly in the future was probably ridiculed relentlessly. Only now humans do fly, all thanks to two optimistically driven brothers who just wouldn’t give up. I guess the joke was on the realists.
Okay, radical optimism and toxic positivity are very different. I’ll admit, I may have leaned toward the latter during periods of my life. But I’ve also come to understand real optimism is earned and you actually have to work for it. As you already know, I call it being an optimist in action, and it basically means if you show up for the work, you’re living the change, and the good thoughts and feelings will come through to reward you. It’s like optimism on autopilot—you need it to get going, but the work itself creates more.
A lot of realism is infused in that way of being. You don’t just hope for things to happen; you understand that only when you apply realistic measures and strengths to an issue will you actually be able to reap a reward. However, as you go on, your view on that realistic outcome will probably change, as you become a living example that we can do hard things and push boundaries for the better.
The question shouldn’t be whether you see yourself as an optimist or a realist—the classic “Is your glass half empty or half full?” Instead, reflect on where your focus is and what you actually want to have happen. Being aware and choosing to be the change you wish to see, you become an optimist—a realistic one. What you should really ask yourself is, “Do I want to be realistically optimistic or would I rather stay complacent in my beliefs?”
To give you a hint: one keeps you stuck, the other gets you moving, so choose consciously.
I’ve intuitively known my whole life that optimism is good for me. When I was just a little girl, I would write myself happy notes and hang them on my door before going to bed. That way I knew I would wake up with an encouraging message to start the day. I did this way before I learned anything about the power of thought or the law of attraction. I simply recognized that when I made myself feel a certain way the first thing in the morning, my chances of having a good day rose exponentially.
I later learned that this is called “priming” and has been scientifically proven to have wonderful effects on people’s happiness and careers. You’re basically tuning yourself in for success like you would tune in a radio station to capture your favorite music. And it works—thinking that your day will be good significantly raises your chances of having a good day.
I will explain this and much more in the coming chapters.
Before we get to that, it’s worth pointing out that optimism is a developed skill only humans have. Thanks to our frontal cortex (the most recently developed part of our brain, the part right behind your forehead), we can do some pretty awesome things. For one, we can think of something that has yet to happen—we can imagine a reality yet to be.
For example, you can think about what you will eat for dinner tonight or what you are going to wear to the party on Friday. In other words, you can envision things that are not right in front of you right now. This is pretty cool stuff. No other species can do this.
The other awesome thing is you can create an expectation of what that yet-to-be scene will look like. For example, you can expect your veggie curry to be delicious and your outfit on Friday night to make you look amazing. You can also dream up a scenario where your outfit will help you catch the eye of the person you have a crush on; they will ask you to dance, you’ll kiss on the dance floor at the end of the night, fall madly in love, and eventually get married and have a house, dogs, and kids, while staying together forever. (Let’s be real—everyone has been here at least once.)
Have you ever hoped for something to happen—even believed it would—only to be disappointed? They never proposed, the trip was ruined by bad weather, or your boss decided to promote someone else. Whatever it is, I’m sure you have many stories because the truth is we all do—we all dream of things that never happen. The interesting fact is most of us are much more optimistic than we’re aware. In fact, 80 percent of the human population is inherently optimistic, walking around believing things will be better than they actually turn out to be. (This goes for pessimist too.)
Hang on a second—I’m living in an illusion of a world that probably will never be?
That’s right. Studies show the majority walk around with an optimistically biased mindset, simply called the Optimism Bias. We simply envision future scenarios as better than they actually turn out to be. I understand it might sound incredibly stupid to fool ourselves all the time, but doesn’t it make you wonder why this is? How is it that our brains, the incredible computer we have inside our heads, is wired to think of future outcomes as more favorable than reality will allow? Is there maybe something important about our ability to think this way?
Absolutely, and soon enough we will understand how incredibly important this talent is. Our species is not dumb, and in many ways, optimism isn’t just good for us; we need it to survive. Sure, hoping your hottie will kiss you at the dance isn’t life or death, but the very fact that we can muster hope is what has taken us through millennia of change and brought the human species to where we are today.
If you don’t think there’s life and water on the other side of those sand dunes, how would you muster the strength and willpower to trek through the scorching hot desert? If you don’t think your invention will enhance the lives of millions and make you some money in the process, how could you justify all those hours in the lab?
You could say human achievements throughout time—athletic, societal, social justice, scientific—are the result of grit, sweat, and tears, and maybe a bit of crazy too. That’s all true, but none of the grit, sweat, or tears (or even the crazy) would be rational in the first place had there not been a vision to fuel it, and that is what optimism is.
As you can probably tell, I’m a sucker for all this, but I don’t want to be alone in this optimist squad, so in the next chapter, I will share my three main reasons for becoming a fan of optimism.
Welcome to the world of positive thinking.